Green Hill Good News, October 2014

(online edition)


The lights are back on!

HOLY HUMOR – Finding the Perfect Pastor

The perfect pastor does indeed exist – you’ve never met them, but you know they are out there. This is a sure-fire way of guaranteeing that you will be served by the perfect pastor, should you have enough faith to do what is necessary. First, just in case you have never dreamed of the perfect pastor, he/she must be defined:

….The perfect pastor preaches exactly 10 minutes. The perfect pastor condemns sin roundly, but never hurts anyone’s feelings.

….The perfect pastor works from 8 a.m. until midnight, and is also the church janitor.

….The perfect pastor makes $100 a week, wears stylish clothes, drives a new car that reflects well on your church, buys ten excellent books each week, and donates $80 a week to the parish.

….The perfect pastor is 29 years old and has 40 years’ worth of experience.

…Above all, the perfect pastor is very attractive.

….The perfect pastor has a burning desire to work with teen-agers, and he/she spends most of his/her time with the senior citizens.

….The perfect pastor smiles all the time with a straight face because he/she has a sense of humor that keeps him/her seriously dedicated to the church.

….The perfect pastor makes 15 home visits a day and is always in the office to be handy when needed.

….The perfect pastor always has time for church council and all of its committees. He/she never misses the meeting of any church organization, and is always busy evangelizing the unchurched.

….The perfect pastor is broken enough to understand all people, but perfect in mental, emotional and physical health.

….The Perfect Pastor is always in the next county over where your friend attends church.

If your pastor does not measure up, simply send this notice to six other churches that are tired of their pastor too. Then bundle up your pastor and send him/her to the church at the top of your list. If everyone cooperates, in one week you will receive 1,643 pastors from which to choose. One of them should be perfect.

Have faith in this letter – it works. But beware! One church broke the chain and got its old pastor back in less than three months.

Reprinted with permission from the Joyful Noiseletter


• Fall Work Day will be Saturday, October 18, 2014. Come early and be ready to spruce up the church grounds and so some tasks inside.
• Support for Iraqi Christians: Missions Committee will have a box in the narthex for several weeks for personal contributions for support of Iraqi Christians through the Presbyterian Frontier Fellowship.
• Town Hall Meetings – Town Hall Meetings will be held from 6:15pm – 6:45pm on the following Wednesday evenings following Fellowship Suppers: 24 September, 29 October, and 19 November. These are open discussions designed to educate members of our denomination and for Session to get direct input from members attending regarding Green Hill’s future. Two Session members will facilitate each meeting.
• Session Meetings – All Sessions meetings will be held at 1:30pm on monthly first Sundays with Rev. Jamison moderating.
• Elementary Sunday Teacher is needed – Please prayerfully consider volunteering.
• Adult Sunday School: Welcome back to Scott S. who is teaching the Adult Sunday School Class for this quarter.
• Pastor’s Nominating Committee: PNC is meeting with Presbyter Sanford Turner on September 8, 2014.
• Newcomers Welcome Luncheon: All families who are new to Green Hill since last October are invited to a “Soup and Dessert” dinner right after worship on October 5th.


Thank you to Rev. David Jamison and Rev. Louie Reynolds for being our Guest Ministers during the month of September. We look forward to seeing both again when they are able to join us.


Please mark the date on your calendar now: Our Women’s fall gathering will be held Saturday, October 25, 2014, at Ryan’s Family Steak House Restaurant. Our guest speaker will be Susan Owens from the Vivian B. Adams School. She will update us on the good things that are going on at the school and tell us how we might help out.

With our program there will be a short business meeting where you will hear about the activities and mission projects that have been selected for this year and you can suggest others you would like for us to do.

Our Bible Study on II Corinthians – Treasures in Earthen Vessels began on September 11th. This first lesson covered II Corinthians, chapter 1. There is still room for you in the study. Our next lesson will be on Thursday, October 9th, at 11:00am, here at the church. If you are able, please read II Corinthians, chapters 2 and 3, before coming. Also, study sheets are available. We will have another great year together with this journey through II Corinthians.

God bless you all! We hope to see you October 9th for study and October 25th for our gathering.

-Betty Jo


Pizza & Game Night will be held on Wednesday, October 8 at 5:30pm. It’ll be an evening of eating pizza and playing games. Please bring your favorite board game to share with us. All ages are invited.  The cost for dinner is just $3 for adults, $1 for children, and Free for kids under 6 years old. If you plan to attend, please let the church office know. Reservation slips are available in the pew racks.


The choir has two practices scheduled for October, on the 15th and the 29th, immediately following the Wednesday Bible Studies. The choir will NOT meet on the other Wednesdays. For more information, please contact Rosemary C.


The next Alzheimer’s Caregivers Support meeting will be held on October 15. These monthly meetings are open to anyone who is dealing with Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia in their family. We will get together, share our stories, and work on learning more about how to deal with these diseases.


It’s that time of year again: time to clean up the church grounds for fall. Please join us on Saturday, October 18, at 8am. Bring your favorite yard tool. Coffee will be hot and ready. We’ll try to get everything done by Noon.


All are invited to attend a “Soup and Dessert Celebration” on Sunday, October 5, immediately following the morning worship service. If you’re looking to learn more about Green Hill, this luncheon and time of informal fellowship is a great place to start. If you’re already part of the Green Hill family, either officially or just in spirit, please join us for this meal. If you’re just looking for something to eat after church, we want you to come too!


Information for the November Green Hill Good Newsletter needs to be submitted to the church office by Tuesday, October 21. You can contact the office by email or by phone, or you can drop your news off in the basket on the door. Many thanks to those who contribute!


Being a Christian is like being a pumpkin. God lifts you up, takes you in, and washes all the dirt off of you. He opens you up, touches you deep inside, and scoops out all the yucky stuff…including the seeds of doubt, hate, greed, etc. Then, He carves you a smiling face and puts His Light inside you to shine for all the word to see. Are you sending His Light out to all of the pumpkins in your patch?


Plan ahead and mark your calendars now. The following special events will replace our regular Wednesday suppers in October, November, and December.

October 8th – Pizza & Games
November 12th – Taco Fiesta
November 26th – None, day before Thanksgiving
December 3rd – Chrismon Tree Decorating
December 10th – Christmas Party
December 17th – Christmas Caroling
December 24th – Christmas Eve, Communion Service

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